well this painting of me in hospital drag is indeed dragging on.And I love it but it is at the moment keeping me awake at night thinking about what or what not to do.I offered it to the Cairns Base Hospital where I spent that  lovely week. Then received a very nice and long letter explaining it was too large.I, no IT, spent some time in my outside studio, all 1.30x2 m. Life size.I thought after some time I should turn this into a project, an arty project or maybe a little crazy.You see, I had the idea to spray the painting completely black. It has many relief lines and the pyjama is a real one simply flattened. So it would show itself simply by reflection.And it did beautifully. I cheeted a little by spraying side ways with aluminium coloured paint.Then I would douse it in petrol and burn my ''self portrait". Or my "Alto Ego"A friend Mick reminded me of the Phoenix rising from the ashes.That somehow made it to my mind legitimate to burn.To be exhicuted by fire.But as I had this lovely black painting looking at me I fell a little in love with it. With him.How strange, no ? I couldn't just burn it, him, and that is that.I decided to make it brighter. To add flowers and butterflies. To change the dark background to a pale blue.Then I had the wicked idea to copy the painting. Just do it again. Have 2 of them.So I asked Clemens, ( the eternal mate since I was 7 years old in Indonesia), to help me.I layed down on a large thick paper and Clemens traced my body with a pentel pen. Again, the second time.I then cut it out and just for the moment it is hanging in the tree.Why did I copy it ?I thought I could burn the newly arrival and save the now so pretty original me, or it.From my bedroom/computer room I can see me/it hanging in the tree outside and it turns slowly, disappearingfor a split second, reappearing in all its/his glory.Now I cannot even burn that white figure, who looks very much like me and the other one.So now I have two separate painting and  now I'll have to get a third canvas at the required size and will have three oversized paintings. Clemens get your pentel pen ready again.!!!Too many to burn but I'll come to that later.But it is so self analysing. Also a little self rediculing.Ah, as we artist do, I'll try and sleep tonight. Crawl under the God' bed. Maybe I'll understand what this all about.I will print a small amount of booklets. I'll ask Clemens to take a photo of the three of us.Then I'll see what to do next.Start hanging the two figures in the big tree at the back. 

Here some photos of the objet trouvé and my blue bag and I with my painting in the garden (click to enlarge):

Then something happened.

I was lying on my bed with a slightly sore toe. I stood up in the night and stepped on the dog Angelo and the angel thought I was the devil or  an intruder or murderer so bit my left big toe and wouldn't let lose !!
I screamed out and Clemens got up out of a deep sleep and separated teeth from toe. Poor Angelo was over me like  a loving dog but my toe was leaking badly.

Anyway, I was thinking: Goodness, we live in a lucky country indeed.  And very very tolerant.
 
We have a woman Prime-Minister, I voted for her, living in sin with a man. And we have a greens senator for Tasmania who is openly gay and a big eared Liberal leader without a clue. Like a sweet jumping chimpanzee.
 
A Chinese minister for Finance who, also, is openly a lesbian.
Every two weeks I get $840 for just breathing and if I had a problem with breathing an ambulance would be at the front door before I could exhale !!

Again: shadows but more.....
These shadows wouldn't leave me yet.
I started to hang up a sheet on a string in the garden and create scenes.
Arrange the setting and than photograph them. If not Clemens as figure myself so I took the Clemens photos and he made the Paul ones.

Then with Clemens huge computer knowledge, I have zero !, we changed the colours and sometime the shapes.

So have a look. It is a booklet made by us both. The first time. I also made of these pictures and text a booklet. Below.

If you want a hardcopy you'll have to let me know (click) as I haven't got enough funds to post them to all you loyalists.
 
phb

These shadows wouldn't leave me yet.
I started to hang up a sheet on a string in the garden and create scenes.
Arrange the setting and than photograph them.
If not Clemens as figure myself so I took the Clemens photos and he made the Paul ones.
Then with Clemens huge computer knowledge, I have zero !, we changed the colours and sometime the shapes.
So have a look. It is a booklet made by us both. The first time.
I also made of these pictures and text a booklet. Below.
If you want one you'll have to let me know as I haven't got enough funds to post them to all you loyalists.
phb

Just started working on my 5th booklet called 'Paul Bakker and Mistakes'.

It will be made public soon.

Sitting outside the other week I saw a beautiful shadow on the inside wall of the gazebo we have in the garden.

It was of Clemens talking to son Casper. I took a photo and then Clemens took a photo of my shadow.      

Shadows left: Clemens and Casper. Right: Paul and little finger.

I made these little figures only a few days ago. Finished, more or less, the male a few hours ago.

Father, mother and child. The child was found in the park during our daily walks with the two Godlike dogs. Or Doglike Gods.

The wooden figures I also find on my walks and with minor adjustments with sandpaper and a sharp knife they become what they are.Also Godly figures like Angelo and Vinci, the animals. The man is a runner or a tango dancer, the woman stands alone thinking and the baby is just a little plastic doll. Not sure if she has a soul. Of course she has as I chose her to put on a pedestal..

I photographed them outside. Taking them from my incredibly messy room.That's what Clemens always says. He's right of course.

I need help, I need a housekeeper !!!

We, Clemens as I did, were always brought up with servants. In  Indonesia we had baboes and one jongos, a male.with a head band. In Iran we had only house boys. The nicest one was Wah-hap, in his fiftieths and an Arab. Not the loved race by the Iranians. who felt terribly superior.They still do. Ask Gomeini or Kohmeini.

But when I lived in Terena, Portugal, I had a woman to look after my house and myself. Lived there off and on for nearly 20 years.

Lately I have been making little books again. I finished a few weeks ago a book with the title: Paul Bakker and Cats and just today a book with the title: Paul Bakker and Trees.
It is great fun as I went through all my paintings with cats and Trees.
I never knew I had done so many!
The Tree book is  12 pages plus cover .
I would love to send everybody a copy but the cast too much to print, not to think of postage.
However if you want one or more copies let me know and I'll see what I can do.
Now have a look at the pages and I hope you enjoy them as much as I do myself !!!
I am a little proud of them......

Yesterday we got back from the south of Queensland.
We had done a runner from Cairns, Far Northern Queensland, as the Government advised ALL to flee..
The cyclone Yasi had been approaching.
So, as good and frightened citizens we hopped in the car and made a dash for the south.
Yasi decided to follow us. We went through a pretty beach place called Cardwell, abandoned for sure, windows taped up etc but it was quiet and peaceful. Our two dogs, loves of our life, traveling with us needed a break. Angelo, named after Michael Angelo, and Vinci, named after Da Vinci.
Cardwell was a very pretty place and we stood on the beachfront with a row of palmtrees.
We left and ten hours later it was devasteated. Same with Tully, further down..In Cardwell the beautiful row of palmtrees along the coast where we stood with the dogs were all gone.
We saw that devastation on our way back. Then came Tully, near Townsville.
We left and it was also hit in a mighty way. So sad.
We found ourselves at Mark's, Clemens eldest son and my godson. (Clemens is my friend from when we were 7 years old in Indonesia and later Iran and Holland. Then Australia !!!)

Photo caption left: From canvas to coffee table book - ready for the cut. Right: The coffee table books.

Looking around my studio I see again and again a number of large paintings against the wall, all 120x120 cm.

All without a purpose in life. A little shameful really. I had given them so much attention at the time and now they are like an abandoned child or a school kid with his face against the wall.